A Day in the Life of a pre-Debut Author

Jun 18, 2014

So it's kinda funny, realizing your book comes out in less than 5 months. Sort of giddy-making, really. A tad bit terrifying, too. And it's also kinda funny, looking at your life and realizing how much has changed-- and how little has changed. So today, just for kicks, I thought I'd do a post about the day in the life of this pre-debut author.

6:00 am-- Wake up to alarm and write the Next Book. Maybe. If you didn't stay up too late catching up on season 7 of Doctor Who last night. No, you're definitely waking up, because the new book must be written. So you write. And you realize this book is awful. Why are you even writing this? People are going to hate it. YOU hate it.

7:30 am-- Kids are awake, demanding cereal and bananas, or preferably ice cream. You force them to eat the cereal. Baby Girl throws her bowl on the floor in a tantrum. You make her help you clean it up.

8:00 am-- Exercise! Tai chi is da bomb, folks. Sometimes. If you actually get around to it today. Maybe you'll just browse Twitter/Facebook/Tumblr, because you need to do marketing and that's kind of like marketing. Crap, you have so much to do to market this book, you are so behind!

8:30 am-- Kids fighting. Make the Kiddo give his sister back her Winnie the Pooh.

9:00 am-- Check your book's Goodreads stats. You know you shouldn't. It's just numbers, it shouldn't matter. But...what the holy bananas! Fifteen new "to-reads" since last night? How did that happen? Did you tweet something funny? You haven't blogged in like a month, so it's not that. Did somebody somewhere mention your book?

9:15 am-- Google your book title and look for anything new. It's easy to see the links you haven't clicked yet, because they're blue. There are no blue links.

9:30 am-- Holy crap, fifteen people decided to read your book and you have no idea why. What the heck is the point of marketing? You'll just lay back, relax, and let the readers flow in. Marketing plan is off the table.

10:00 am-- Kids demanding snacks-- again. Preferably ice cream. They get graham crackers. You pull out Candyland to play with them. Baby eats the color cards. Kiddo sends his Blue Guy on adventures that have nothing to do with the color cards.

12:00 pm-- Why do kids need to eat so often? Didn't you JUST feed them?

1:00 pm-- Naptime! Kiddo gets a video game, and you get writing time. Except you hate your new book. So you send marketing-related emails to arrange marketing-related things. Go you. And you really need to email your editor about The Thing that's been nagging you. You write the email, but you don't send it. You don't need to bug her about this. Do you need to bug her about this? You do, you don't, you do, you don't.

1:30 pm-- Save the email but don't send. You hate your new book. You can't write it. You should probably shower anyway.

2:00 pm-- Brilliant idea from the shower. You love this book! You knew it was awesome! People everywhere are going to DIE with how much they love it too!

You start writing your new book, and the baby wakes up from her nap. Curses. You check your email with
baby on your lap. Delete the email to editor. PATIENCE.

2:30 pm-- Re-draft the email to your editor, but address to your agent. Delete email. You really don't need to send anybody any emails, The Thing is not even a thing to worry about, so knock it off!

3:00 pm-- Check Goodreads stats. What the? No new "to-reads?" That's it. Marketing plan is back on.

4:00 pm-- Children should probably wear clothes today, not just pajamas. Take children and computer outside. Intersperse writing the brilliant shower idea with chasing children away from the road.

6:00 pm-- Dinner. WHY ALL THE EATING?

8:00 pm-- Bedtime for all non-adults. You should write. But hubby's watching Full Metal Alchemist, and you kinda dig it, and you sort of haven't seem him all day, so...

11:30 pm-- Bedtime for all non-children. Crap. You're never going to make it up by 6 am to write...Wait, did you ever send that email to your editor?

So, my friends, there you have it. A (tongue-in-cheek) day-in-the-life of a pre-debut author. Funny, how it's pretty similar to my pre-pre-debut days...What's been happening in your daily life lately?


Rosalyn said...

I love this. It sounds a lot like my day with 3 kids--except for the having a book coming out part. (Also love the Firefly GIFs. I just got my husband a shirt that said "curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal").

Michelle Merrill said...

Oh my word, you hit it right on the nail! Why can't this be easier??? I check my goodreads stats WAY too often. And my kids are bottomless pits!

BUT...You can do it!

Can't wait for your book release.


L said...

Bet you wouldn't want it any other way!

Jenilyn Collings said...

Haha! I love this! And, seriously, what IS with all the eating? :)

Leigh Covington said...

LOL! Oh man - the truth is always the best way to go! And I love how the book you hate is suddenly fabulous after the brilliant idea hits you in the shower! Yep! Thank heaven for showers! You are always brilliant, my dear, and never disappoint!

ilima said...

Haha. So true. It's like we're pre-debut twins. ;) And you have to tell me about your tai chi! Seriously. Do you just do it on your own at home?

Kami said...

This was hilarious! I am with you on the "why do we eat so much?" thing. Why is it always time for another snack, meal, drink, etc.

September C. Fawkes said...

YEEEEEESSSS I'll finally have someone to freakout with over Full Metal Alchemist! You should totally watch it too!

Haha, well, thanks for the laughs.

Unknown said...

I get inspiration in the shower, too! It's rather inconvenient, so I used to write on the shower wall with dry erase markers. Don't do it. They have to be dry in order to erase. Here's wishing you lightning bolts of inspiration, and occupied children.

Carol Riggs said...

Haha! Love these animated GIFs, as well as the run-down of your day. Mine can be just as rollercoastery with respect to the writerly stuff!

David P. King said...

Nice! Gave me a good laugh there. If I did one of these in detail, I'd be in trouble for violating HIPAA. I should wait until I'm full time writing (if and when). :)

Robin said...

Thanks for the laugh and the reality. You're going to make it and write the best next book. One day/goodreads check at a time:)

Vanessa Morgan said...

So true. Brilliant.

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